Some Days Just Suck

Some days just plain suck, but that’s okay.

Some days I wish I could turn my back on all this grief, this unbearable pain in my heart, this terrible uncertainty, unnatural fear and anxiety. I wish I could turn my back on it all; All this emotional turmoil that takes such a great toll and weighs me down every day.

I wish there was a cure. I wish there was an end. I wish there was “that other side” I could actually reach. I don’t like this burden I carry one bit and I wish there was a way out so I could live a life free from it all. I just wish things were different.

But most of all, I wish my daughter was still here.

Some days just absolutely stink. On these days I ask questions like “why did it have to be my child, was I not a good enough mother, why her Lord, WHY?” Some days are just a losing battle.

But that’s okay.

I will try again tomorrow. Not giving up is the most important thing I can do for myself at this point.

Bad days do and will happen. Still, tomorrow in the morning, I shall rise yet again for another chance at a better day.

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